Billings MT 7 degrees F. tonight. (yikes!). I saw Joy Harjo read her poetry and perform music at MT State U last night. Harjo's poetry was what I needed (and her work is what I need) for centering. So many emotions of joy and deep sorrow for her. And me. I stopped at the Little Bighorn Battlefield yesterday on the way here to Billings, only to stay an hour. To return on Tuesday. I've been only rarely moved as I was there yesterday. I'm excited to return, but apprehensive of feelings to come. I hope my prayers will do well. Prayers at Sand Creek Massacre came from where I don't know. Said with gifts of tobacco, they were deeply satisfying - heard by forgiving beings, I believe (smile). Tomorrow to the Waiting for the Earth to Move: The 1890 Ghost Dance exhibit at the Yellowstone County Museum, to see ((and feel the spirits of(?) the Ghost Dance vestments there. This is my travel as an act of environmental justice. I'm not certain what I truly accomplish, pragmatically, but spiritually it's healing. I love trading stories with those who are tuned in...counts for something that way, anyway. Stacey
Cheyenne, Wyoming. October 20, 2019
In response to "Trans people share their feelings of loss at not experiencing childhood as their true gender," by Vic Parsons, Pink News. October 18, 2019. VIC PARSONS OCTOBER 18, 2019 Not being "one of the boys" in feelings and sensibilities, and tripped up when I expressed them openly. Nevertheless, I thought and did according to my true gender because that was me. Whenever I thought and did boy, it never felt right. I felt guilt then, but not really from not being out, but that doing and thinking boy wasn't right for the world. Also, I was usually chagrined that boys thought they had such a good bead on things, that boy doing and thinking is so so 'correct.' Add a little white privilege to that and.... A beautiful part of this is are the fond memories of grownups, and friends my own age, who understood my head naturally. They were true friends. They saved me. (my favorite song is Gary Clark Junior's song "You Saved Me," for a reason!). One of my tattoos is "show up and be seen" also for a good reason. The tattoo is prominent on my forearm, too. It's interesting that few who see it "get it." We do though, don't we? My tattoos me, and it also honors Nikki Smith. See her story in the May issue of Outside Magazine. She is a lifelong outdoors person, and so am I. With one exception, we are now OUTdoors persons. 😊 |
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